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At the start of the show, seven people have made it and two have been cut (Shelby Dressel and Jessica Furney), so 37 people remain in the holding room, experiencing various levels of anxiety and insanity.  Its worse than the waiting room in Bellevue.

Janell Wheeler had a really good first audition in Orlando, even if her version of The Animals' "House of The Rising Sun" was pretty country-fried.  Moe's comment that he would have said no to Janell seems to me to have been spliced in, because I believe Janell is the TCO -- "The Chosen One", the woman who the producers want to win.  Watching the show again on the computer, when she traverses the Long and Winding Road to the Ejector Seat, Janell is the perfect blonde, an un-devil with a blue dress on, showing a lot of leg.  She's also a "Cowgirl" from Florida, even though she lives in the hick town of Tampa.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRYgE5EQ42Q&feature=related

Also, another comment from Moe that I think was spliced in was when Janell sang a very good version of "American Boy" in Hollywood.  He says to Janell, "I Genuinely Couldn't Remember You."  Being a fan of Kelly Clarkson, that is exactly the same thing Moe said to Kelly in 2002 in Pasadena.  Moe, a graduate of both the Popeil Song-O-Matic School of Writing and the Yogi Berra School of Philosophy, clearly is trying to create deja vu all over again.

Janell beats herself up because she's smart enough to know that she blew Taylor Swift's "Love Story."  When Janell sits in the electric chair, Ellen tells her that she knows she's exhausted.  She comments that Janell is not a professional musician.  She's a "Wine Distributor", meaning that she's a clerk in a liquor store.  Janell replies that "Nothing Is Harder Than Idol," proving that Janell isn't THAT smart.  Ellen does better with the fake-out, saying that its hard to tell someone with (an allegedly) great voice that you are not going through.  So "I'm going to tell you you're going through."  Janell cries tears of joy.  Outside the theater, she tells Seacrest, "If I were Bikini Girl, I'd Kiss You."  Janell wouldn't even be there if she was Bikini Girl. T

yler Grady is from Nazareth, Pennsylvania, near Scranton/Wilkes-Barre.  He had two broken wrists, was tired and filthy at his first audition, so he figured he wasn't going to make it.  But Shemp must have wanted to give him a sponge bath, so he got through.  In Hollywood, he sings a good version of Daughtry's "Home", and unlike Hope Johnson, he makes it clear that the subject of the song is not part of his agenda.  Moe sarcastically mumbles something.

When he gets into the ejector sheet, its clear that Tyler has taken a long shower, but has a new problem -- he's wearing a Members Only jacket.

Tyler is styled as a "70's Rocker."  He tells the Stooges that his heroes are Robert Plant, Roger Daltrey, and Jim Morrison, and he has a bunch of old rock concert DVD's that he watches all the time.  That's great, but I now predict that Tyler will not sing a single rock song during his run on the show.  He reinforces my prediction by telling Shemp, that he'll give her what she wants, and in this case, other than the obvious trysts in Shemp's hotel room, it includes singing pop songs.  Shemp is happy, and tells Tyler he's in the 24.  Tyler is stoked.

The Stooges blather to Crystal Bowersox that they're concerned if this is the right platform for her.  Crystal's answer is good enough. 

They talk to Lilly Scott about her quirkiness (she apparently dyes her hair gray).  The Stooges decide they like quirkiness this season.

Paige Miles is given some compensatory camera time before being told yes, so the audience knows she exists next week. 

The Stooges blather their concern about Haeley Vaughn's talent, but its all fake; she's in. 

Katie Stevens made the Top 24 as soon as the producers decided they loved her sob story. The Stooges seem to give some of the guys -- Jermaine Sellers, John Park, and Joe Munoz -- quick yesses, since the field of men this season is so, so weak.  They spend a little more time faking out Alex Lambert, and he's beside himself that he made it.

Tori Kelly sang well the whole week, but the Producers decided that wasn't good enough.
 

Now we get to the heart of the matter.  The blogs are absolutely livid over the treatment of Chicago's Angela Martin, and the disgust is justified.  Angela has tried out for Idol about four times, and this is the furthest she's ever gotten.  One year, her dad died, another year, she had to go to jail, and also, her little daughter got very sick and had to be hospitalized.  And they didn't even mention her mother.  The update is that her mother had been a drug addict, but was clean for 25 years, until now.  Some of Angela's relatives apparently saw her recently roaming the streets of Chicago, and the impression given is that she's back on drugs. So with all the phony and nonsensical sob stories, Angela, who is also pretty darned talented, and is now at the age limit, has by far the most compelling sob story of all.  Since I knew Angela was not on the spoiled Top 24 list, it would take a disqualification for her to make it, and her name is not Tim Urban.

What happens next is just terribly cruel.  As soon as Shemp slithers like a rattlesnake next to Angela in the ejector seat, the web-based fans have smoke coming out of their ears, while spiders and red ants crawl out of Shemp's hefty bag and onto Angela.  Jim Stafford sings "Spiders and Snakes", and Velvet Revolver sings "Slither" and "Fall To Pieces."  The Wicked Witch Of The West says, "here, my pretty, you are so special and so talented, but you didn't make it.  Now get the hell out!  Ha Ha Ha Ha!"  Shemp is a really lousy person.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lYdD9DdLNY 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKz2U4fvA4U

Angela must have a lot of intestinal fortitude, because if I was Angela I would have pushed Shemp as hard onto the floor as I could as soon as she sat in the chair next to me, and simply walked out.  The producers should have cut Angela in the Room of Doom, BUT NO!

They had to make "Good TV" by cutting the woman who has tried the hardest, and has had the hardest time of all of the 46 people that remained.  Maybe they thought she would faint.

Then, for maximum anticlimactic effect, after cutting both Angela and Jessica Furney, they bring in Lacey Brown, of Amarillo, Texas, who got to the brink last year only to lose a face-off with Megan Joy.  Lacey took it well last year, and is cool as a cucumber.  And so, the least combative of the trio of Jessica, Angela, and Lacey makes it.

Then they pass through Michelle Delamor of Miami Beach.  Unlike Angela, Michelle is more like Beyonce Knowles and is prettier.  At least I can understand this as a business decision -- who is likely to sell more CD's and singles downloads?  Angela or Michelle.

Finally, the show matches up the tapes of Thaddeus Johnson and Andrew Garcia.  Thaddeus is the better raw talent, but Andrew has the buzz on the blogs because he plays guitar, wears a hat my father wore on Delancey Street in 1967, and Clark Kent glasses.  Andrew's reputation is better than his singing.  He also has a wife and a kid, who haven't been with him in Hollywood even though he lives pretty close by in Moreno Valley, California.  Thaddeus is only 17, and his story is that he has a terrific mom.  Andrew has the full monty of sob story. Thaddeus goes first.  After what happens, it wouldn't surprise me if the show hired behavioral psychologists to be present at Hollywood week and tell the producers who they thought would have the biggest meltdowns.  The producers think this makes "Good TV."  So they must have had Thaddeus's number.  The Stooges probably know what's about to happen, so they filibuster a lot until they give Thaddeus the bad news.  Thaddeus starts to cry a little, and asks what he did wrong.  Moe and Larry say he did nothing wrong (not mentioning that Michael Lynche got the overweight African-American male slot, and that Thaddeus might sound a little too much like Ruben Studdard).

Thaddeus leaves the room and meets mom.  Then the water works really get going.  Now, I can understand the cameras following him in the hallway and lobby, but when a camera goes into the bathroom following Thaddeus, clearly a vulnerable 17 year-old kid who has just had his heart broken, just for "ratings" and "buzz", this is too much.  The camera practically goes into the toilet with Thaddeus and his mom, and continues to roll while Thaddeus sobs hysterically inside the stall.

Thaddeus's mom is clearly a saint, because if that camera had been following my kid into the toilet, it would have been broken and that cameraman would have a skull fracture.

American Idol may have "jumped the shark" years ago, but this may be worse than the gay jokes and the exploitation of the handicapped.  American Idol clearly has gone into the toilet, in more ways than one, literally and figuratively.

It then becomes anticlimactic when they put Andrew Garcia through.

Fortunately, the epilogue to all this is more entertaining than infuriating.  Chris Golightly, a bushy-haired blonde guy from Southern California, who was milking the fact that he was abandoned or orphaned as a child, so much so that part of his Twitter URL was "Orphan Idol", was disqualified at the last minute. (Vote For The Worst had nicknamed him "Little Orphan Trannie.")  Golightly was even in the Top 24 group shot at the end of the show, but it was Tim Urban of Texas who was dancing at the very end.

The producers disqualified Golightly because he had a recording contract at the time of his audition, which he failed to disclose.  Well, Holly Golightly clearly had the jalapeno breakfast at IHOP, not Tiffany's, because he's been breathing fire to the press ever since.  He claimed that his contract expired before his audition, whined that he'd been homeless, and claimed that the Stooges and producers told him in Hollywood that he was great, that he was the favorite to win.  I've heard this guy sing, and he's not great, at all.

FOX and Idol are mum, but Golightly, the homeless guy, also said he's going over his options with his lawyers that he somehow is able to afford.  The coup de grace came when the CEO of his record company told the press, in effect, that Golightly was a liar, because he signed a new two-year recording contract in June 2009.  Golightly has so far not denied that.

Now all that has to occur is for the show to boot off that scam artist Fraudrick Hall. Next week, the cookies begin to really crumble.

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