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    American Idol: A Sharp, A Flat, and the Utter Destruction of a Righteous Brother’s Song

    Posted by: Jlynn206 on Apr 26, 2006 - 02:36 PM
    AmericanIdol 
    I was scared of tonight, because I honestly couldn’t figure out what would go down. We had one of our rudest guest judges EVER (Not Bocelli, David) and in general most of the six did pretty well. It’s down to six, and now you CANNOT get higher than a 7/10 for vocals if you have a single pitchy note or bum run. What was cute, is David Foster assumed that our “singers” would want to learn to sing correctly, silly David.

    By Jlynn206

    This article is owned by <a href=”http://www.mediafiends.com/”>MediaFiends.com & may not be reproduced without permission.

    Ah….love songs. I only got one song choice correct, but honestly, any true Elliott fan would have gotten that song choice correct. It was glaringly obvious he would sing it. The other songs, however, were not glaringly obvious. Aside from Chris, I think everyone else chose the wrong song. The judges turned it up 7 notches this week, and are not going to put up with mediocrity. (Finally, they learned what Ruben was, week after week, season two.) Paula Abdul basically told one of our females that she should pack her bags, well, in so many words. You could tell she wanted to say it, but she held back. This same female dared to sing Simon’s favorite song……idiot……. Now, on to the six!

    ***By the way in the first clip, they showed David Foster tearing everyone to shreds, except Kat and Paris.

    KATHARINE MCPHEE: I Have Nothing
    Fresh from the pimp spot, I thought she’d end up somewhere in the middle…alas she is first. When they announced her song I began gripping my couch and my eyes got very wide and I saw very vivid visions of the apocalypse. There’s no doubt about the fact that Kat’s voice sounds excellent in echoey hotel rooms. Guests always think she is excellent, but it’s when that echo is gone that matters. David thought her voice was great, and I think Andrea has a bit of a crush!

    So out come Kat, and HOLY HAIR WEAVE, she’s a brunette Jessica Simpson. And she thought that would distract me from her pitchy note in the second phrase, well she forgot how well I multi-task!!! A major problem Kat has, which Ruben and Kellie also have, is smiling during inappropriate moments in a song. You have NOTHING in this song Kat, it’s nothing to smile about, that person is probably saying they are going to leave you. Maybe one hint of a smile, but not through most of the first half. Never fear, once she nails the very impressive key change that David made up, it really was good, she goes into melodramatic, Cabaret mode, with three forced, strategically placed stomps forward on the beat. Never good to stomp forward angrily on the beat. I promise, it always looks dumb unless you are Cruella DeVille. I’m glad David switched up the key change, and she did one or two new things with the song. There was a really messy run at the end, but in general I liked it eons better than the judges. I was actually pleasantly surprised. I thought the song would swallow her whole, but she actually rode the song out decently. Above average, at the very least. I did think her hair was going to rebel and eat her face. I knew Randy was gonna be ticked. He thought it was way too big for her, and frankly Paula and Simon’s comments just got worse. Topped off with Ryan saying, “Well good thing people can watch you on mute.” I was like, whoa, I don’t think he meant that to come off quite like that. Kat handled it well, she did look bewildered when Paula told her she had pitch problems, but Paula understanding anything about pitch is bewildering.
    VOCALS: 7/10 Performance: 6/10 TOTAL: 13/20

    ELLIOTT YAMIN: A Song For You
    David says Elliott really really sings well, and he had more to say, but they had to cut it off because they had spent too much time letting Bocelli and David discuss Kat’s looks. Elliott looks hot in his suit, and I don’t usually use that word unless I’m describing good vibrato, but seriously, adorable. He gives a shout out to the yaminions, I bet they are ecstatic, and he also introduces us to Donnie Hathaway’s daughter. (Hey E, if you and your girl friend break up, call Donnie’s daughter, I think she might have a crush) Man, Elliott really, really sings this so darn well. I agree with Randy, that the arrangement was sort of hard to follow, but Elliott always tries to fit 18 good parts of a song into a minute. I can’t wait till we just get to hear the kid sing a whole song! He is so comfortable and so connected to this song, and I agree with Paula that he so looks like the real deal tonight.

    There are some truly impeccable moments here, and in the performance he does not do what David suggested, which I think proves E has finally gained confidence, because in the past he’s taking some crappy advice here and there. He left Paula in the biggest sob I’ve ever seen her in, and she really gets Elliott and what is so awesome about him. Simon even has to admit to his first statement, and says parts of that performance were vocal master class superb. Man, when he said “Singin’ this song for you” he looked directly at the camera. He’s finally catching on!
    Vocals: 9.5/10 Performance: 9.5/10 TOTAL: 19/20

    KELLIE PICKLER: Unchained Melody
    For all those naysayers, it’s official, Kellie’s not playing, she really is an idiot. She may play up being an idiot, but anyone who sings “Suds in a Bucket,” “gyrates to “Bohemian Rhapsody,” and then thinks she is capable of just sitting and singing Simon’s favorite song is a moron. David rudely suggested she make the huge head voice jump, which Kellie decides to try. I wish he would have suggested some other stuff, because Kellie does little with this. I’ve decided Randy gets so excited at jumps to the falsetto and the head voice he immediately goes deaf for a whole minute and doesn’t know what hit him. That really was not on, it wasn’t wretched, but let’s stop handing Kellie compliments for NOT being wretched. That’s not good enough. Right from the start she is pitchy, because she’s not dropping the jaw or breathing correctly. It gets up to “okay” somewhere in the middle, but than it is flat in many parts. I considered the jump a bit sharp, but at least she got there. Some more flat notes, and an inaudible note at the bottom. Paula said it best, “You get to this stage of the competition and you expect to see greatness and you don’t raise the bar every week.” Kellie has NEVER raised the bar, any week.
    Vocals: 3/10 Performance: 3/10 Total: 6/20

    PARIS: Memories
    HOLY BORING SONG CHOICE! Paris is back in way too old for me, obnoxious ballad mode, which I think was a BIG mistake. I think she needed Natalie Cole’s “This Will Be,” in a bad way. She also needs to relax her eyebrows and release the tension in her jaw, but whatever. I thought it was kind of rough at the beginning, and then it had some off notes and some really nice big notes. Sort of like a Mandisa performance. There was a bit of a falter at the end of the last note, and I loathe this song so much that my roommate and I actually started talking towards the end, which I never do. Agree with Paula for the fifteenth time tonight, this lady is on, that Paris over sung a bit. It was just a bad choice.
    Vocals: 7/10 Performance: 7/10 TOTAL: 14/20

    TAYLOR: Just once.
    Ugh. I don’t like this song. Kudos for David for pointing out that bringing out a raspy scream does not mean you are hitting the correct notes. Taylor has a tentative weak start and then he’s all flat and junk. He’s showing the most vocal weakness ever and there’s a messy run and a screamy reach for a high note and then his last note is sharp. Right…..
    Vocals: 5/10 Performance: 5/10 Total: 10/20

    CHRIS: Really Loved a Woman
    David attempts to teach Chris how to sing properly, but that would take more than one singing lesson and Chris learns virtually nothing and actually sings the most incorrect we’ve ever seen. So unfair with the frickin’ Chris show every week! Guitars strategically placed as if the amateurs are over and not it’s time for the concert. He’s a teeny bit flat, than a teeny bit sharp, regardless of how he got to the note, he has a nice top note. Then he gets to the bridge and goes into straining, pull all the sound back and lift my eyebrows overload, I was surprised he didn’t stand on his tippy toes. All he had to do was open his mouth instead of drag the sound back with what is essentially a smile. Hehe…he should have just done it lying down with a camera above. All together he easily takes second best of the night.
    Vocals: 6/10 Performance: 9/10 TOTAL: 15/20

    So Kellie may never get the pimp spot, because frankly she is never impressive. Poor thing.
    Final Scores:
    6. Kellie: 6/20
    5. Taylor: 10/20
    4. Kat: 13/20
    3. Paris: 14/20
    2. Chris: 15/20
    1. Elliott: 19/20


    Oh if only that can be the order they are voted off, well Kat and Paris can switch places for all I care, but man….that would be beautiful!

    I think the bottom three, if they show all three:

    Should be: Kellie, Taylor, Kat (with Kellie going home)
    Will Be: Paris, Kellie, and Elliott/Katharine (with Paris going home)

    This is Jlynn206, you can email me at Jlynn206 at aol.com

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